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Monthly Archives: March 2013

facebook red squareThis week, the Supreme Court is deciding whether or not they have a right to prohibit same-sex marriage. In support of same-sex marriage, several users on Facebook have changed their profile picture to a red square with a pink equal sign inside of it. The symbol supports marriage equality.

I’m not changing my profile picture, because I sort of think campaigns like that on Facebook are pointless. Are the-powers-that-be going to be stalkin’ through profiles, trying to determine what the majority of people believe in? Probably not.

However, I am 100% for marriage equality and, this week, have been floored by the number of people in my life (and on my Facebook) who take issue against it.

The reasons I have seen against Proposition 8 are all over the board. Some Catholics chime in that it’s against their religion and shouldn’t be allowed. I know I didn’t grow up under any one umbrella of a religious organization, so correct me if I’m wrong, but I sort of thought that having sex out of wedlock, living in sin and getting divorced were also “against the rules”. Most people I know have no problem doing those things. Weird. Do you go to church every Sunday? To Confession every time you masturbate or take the Lord’s name in vain? Didn’t think so. So I guess what you’re saying is that you treat your religion like a Choose Your Own Adventure book, where all paths lead to a place where it’s ok for YOU to break the rules, but not ok for two men who are in love? Is that what you’re saying? You can just pick and choose what’s convenient for you to follow and where you lay your loyalties? Gotcha.

I’ve also heard “I’m old-fashioned when it comes to things like this.” Things like what, exactly? Two people falling in love and committing their lives to each other? Well, sure. Love is, like, the oldest thing ever. Right? So you’re totally cool with Kim Kardashian getting married and divorced within 72 days (and have no qualms buying magazines that glorify the failed nuptials), but if two women have been in love for over two decades, you think you have the right to look down upon them and deny them the simple act of filing an official certificate with the state, recognizing their devotion to one another?

your high horse“But two women together or two men together cannot procreate.” Guess what. A penis in a vagina doesn’t always guarantee a baby. And I think it’s safe to say that there are enough children in this world waiting to be adopted after being tossed aside by the penis and vagina tag team that created them. These children spend their days dreaming about being brought into a home filled with joy and laughter and affection. You’re telling me that joy and laughter and affection can only exist in a home that contains a husband and a wife?

You’re telling me that a home that is full of abuse and neglect between a husband and wife is allowed, but one where two men or two women love each other is not?

I hope that you enjoy the view you have from the very high horse that you sit upon.

We live in America and the year is 2013. Women were allowed to vote 90+ years ago. 45 years ago, we realized that denying an interracial couple the right to wed was absurd, so we got rid of that, too.

Nearly every one of my peers considers this a non-issue. It will be a travesty if gay couples need to wait another twenty years until my generation is in power and in a position to change things.

Spend a little less time concerned with the lives of others and a little more time focused on your own. THAT’S how you can make this world a better place.

same sex marriage, prop 8, proposition 8, support same sex marriage

My cousin Samantha created this. Guys, it seems pretty simple to me.


I don’t want to keep you on the edge of your seats any longer. So, as promised, here is part 2 of my award acceptance – 7 questions asked by the blog who nominated me, Griselda Mood.

1)      If you could have any job in the world, what would it be? I would be a very successful screenwriter who, in between scripts, gets to sample and name new polish collections from Essie, OPI, ZOYA and China Glaze. Not only do I get these polishes for free, but I actually get PAID for all of the creative hard work I put into the process. Seems legit.

After I’m the recipient of all the confetti glory, someone like this guy will clean up the mess.

After I’m the recipient of all the confetti glory, someone like this guy will clean up the mess.

2)      Do you have a Bucket List and, if so, what are some things on it? My bucket list is so lame compared to others. I don’t want to skydive or hike a volcano or anything. Something that I’ve recently crossed off was “Walking in a parade”. Lame, right? Whatever, I wanted to do it! (And walked with The Husband and his students in a 4th of July town parade.) Other items still to-do on my list include being shot at with a confetti cannon and seeing a “fin” in its natural habitat. (A little elaboration – we went on a cruise for our honeymoon and also went to Aruba last fall. I thought it would be awesome if we saw a dolphin, some whales or sharks, just swimming along, minding their own business. The more I DIDN’T see any of these animals, the more obsessed I became with it happening. The key to this is that I want it to happen naturally. I don’t want to go on a whale watch in order to see these. I just want to be lounging on a beach, minding my own business, when a pod of dolphins goes swimming buy, jumping up and doing tricks for us humans, who then stand up, clapping and cheering them on. The Husband tries to tell me that he doesn’t think wild dolphins will just perform like that, but I’m sure he’s wrong.)

Sammy the Seal, living out his retirement days

Sammy the Seal, living out his retirement days

3)      How did you meet your spouse? Jason and I were both pre-k teachers at the same place. I remember meeting him, being attracted to him and then immediately being annoyed that all the women there fawned over him (he was the only guy). I always say that the only reason Jason wanted to date me was BECAUSE I didn’t flirt with him like everyone else, and he didn’t understand why. (Jason needs everyone to love him. Sorry buddy, but you know it’s true.) He finally broke me down, though. Our classrooms connected with a window. One morning, while conducting circle time with a seal animal puppet on his hand, he saw me through the window. “Good morning, Miss Heather. You look very pretty today, Miss Heather! I like you, Miss Heather,” Sammy the Seal flirted with me. (My last day of work there, I stole Sammy the Seal. He now proudly sits on a dresser in our bedroom, next to a wedding picture.)



4)      Favorite place you’ve travelled to? I was very fortunate to marry into a family that looooves them a good vacation. Over the last few years, I’ve been to Vegas and Orlando. On our honeymoon, we flew to Tampa and went on a cruise, which took us to Mexico, The Cayman Islands, Belize and Honduras. All of these places were amazing in their own right. But I’d say my favorite place to visit was Aruba. It was just amazing. We stayed at the all-inclusive Riu Palace and our room overlooked the gorgeous turquoise waters. The weather was perfect, the sand was soft, the people were friendly. We had a fantastic time.

5)      Where did you go to college? I leisurely took a tour of the New York State higher education system. I started off at SUNY Brockport (which, in the grand scheme of my life, was just a blip on my radar but was when I met Al, who was my roomie.) I made my way back home and spent a few semesters at Mohawk Valley. After THAT, I went downstate to Marymount Manhattan. (That also didn’t last long, but was when I met another best friend, Danielle. She’s an amazing nail artist. Go ahead and like her Facebook page.) EVENTUALLY, for truly no reason, I ended up at UAlbany. By moving here, I met my husband. I believe that I ended up in all of these places because these people were all meant to be in my life. (I say that instead of saying that I was wishy-washy and non-committal. It sounds better, amirite?)

6)      Favorite snack? All the snacks. All the snacks are my favorite. I spend a good chunk of my afternoon trying to decide what I’ll have for my night time snack. Chips and dip still ranks pretty high for me, probably landing the top spot. I am also very partial to popcorn, cereal and baked goods.

7)      If you could live anywhere, where would it be? I’m actually very happy with where we are now. If I could live ANYWHERE, I’d say a gorgeous house in The Hamptons. It would be close enough for me to work in the city, but far enough away where we’d be able to have a large yard for Bumble and future kiddo-s to play in. Plus, it’s The Hamptons.

Now, it’s my turn to nominate a couple of blogs for the award. I’m going to start with Karen Splendido of Splendid Stems. Karen is not only an amazing florist, but she’s also a total sweetheart. And, she needs a swift kick in her butt to keep up on her blogging. Karen – we, the people, want to see more flowers! More posts! More weddings!

My second nominee is Jillian at Cameos and Cardigans. What’s Jillian’s blog about? Pretty things. Girly things. Make-up tips. Hair tutorials. Outfits. Check it out.

I’m also nominating Danielle at 10th Story Nails. Her Tumblr is photo-oriented, but I bet she’d have fun with the random facts and questions.

liebster award meaning

“Liebster” actually means “dearest” in German, so that’s pretty precious.

To all (7) of my loyal readers –

It is with great honor that I accept the Liebster Blog Award!

“But, Heather, what IS a Liebster Blog Award? Is it something you just made up? It sounds like something you’d make up. How do you win the Liebster Blog award? I bet one of your friends just gave it to you or something,” you say.

way harsh taiWow. First of all, that was way harsh, Tai. I most certainly didn’t make it up. But, at some point, someone did. Basically, the award is “given” to blogs with less than 200 followers, but a blog that some OTHER blogger reads and says “Why doesn’t this person have more followers?! Maybe if we give them a fake award, it will increase their following, thus resulting in their eventual profit from their musings!” When you receive the award bestowed upon you from another blogger, you are to write 11 random facts about yourself and answer a couple of questions from the blogger who nominated you. Got it?!

… and, you’re right. One of my friends DID give me the award, but I think it’s safe to say that I absolutely deserve it. If you finish reading one of my posts and think to yourself, “This was good, but I just wish there was MORE snarkiness .. AND more cute babies!” then go over and check out my bestest friend, Allee’s blog, Griselda Mood.

Anyways, without any further blabbering (the whole point of this is to blabber, I think) I present you with 11 random facts about me. (I was positive I did a post on this before, but now I can’t find it. But, feel free to go back and read every one of my posts in order to find it. I won’t mind.)

1)      I am terribly, unabashedly, irrationally afraid of frogs. THINKING of frogs makes me squirm. Seeing a picture of a frog makes me anxious. Seeing a frog in real life makes me sob out of fear. I’m not positive where this originated. A couple of years ago, Jason decided that it was getting out of hand, and we did research on treatment. We couldn’t find treatment that didn’t involve immersion therapy and heeelllllll no am I doing that. However, we did find a common origin of the fear. People who had an instance of running frogs over with their car often develop a fear of frogs. When I was 16, and just learning to drive, I was on my way to my aunt’s house (with my parents) when we came upon a road covered in leaves. As I got closer, I realized they weren’t leaves, but frogs. No exaggeration, 100+ frogs (she lived near a marsh). I didn’t know what to do and my dad told me just to keep driving. (Thinking about this is making me anxious.) At the time, I don’t remember being scared of frogs, but now, I can’t remember a time when I WASN’T afraid.

2)      I love nail polish. I have close to 200 bottles (nearly half of those are Essie). This is a new obsession, developing a couple of years ago when we got engaged. People always wanted to see my ring, and I didn’t want my plain, ol’ nails flashed to everyone.

spring wedding flowers

A gorgeous arrangement care of Splendid Stems!

3)      My favorite flowers are tulips and I’d never be excited about receiving a bouquet of roses.

4)      I am very confident in my ability to quote nearly the entire script of Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead. (“You are supposed to … go down … to per-so-nnel. That. Is on. The first. Floooor….”)

5)      From as early as I can remember, up until about 8 years old, I spent every Friday night sleeping over my (maternal) grandparents’ house. And, every single Friday, much to my Grandma’s dismay, my Grandpa would buy me a can of Frito Lays Jalapeno Cheddar dip and I would eat nearly the entire can by myself.

6)      ( continuation from #5) When I was 19, I had to have my gall bladder out. My doctor told me that he never saw someone so young and so full of gall stones. My grandparents had both passed away by then, but my family and I joked that my Grandma was up in heaven saying, “See, Ant?! I TOLD you that she shouldn’t have been eating that!!”

she fought alone7)      My favorite Lifetime movie is the 2005 gem She Fought Alone, starring Tiffani-Amber Thiessen and Brian Austin Green. Tif, the new girl in town, gets raped by a popular athlete. Then, all of their cool girlfriends chop off her hair and shout “slut” at her. Brian USED to be part of the cool clique, but then decides that what his bestie did was wrong, and then him and Tif fall in love and the jock goes to jail and then she leaves for community college while the Blues Travelers plays softly in the background. The end! So good! (Note: I understand that in the wake of everything happening in Steubenville, that this may not be the most sensitive comment. But it IS my favorite Lifetime movie and this IS a list of random facts about me. I’d like to note that I do NOT condone rape.)

8)      I usually, accidently, eat an entire box of Peeps in less than ten minutes.

9)      I hate “double sound”. What’s double sound, you ask? It’s when two electronic devices are playing at once. Ex – the tv and a youtube video. Ahhh! Makes me crazy.

10)   My favorite book is “The Time Traveler’s Wife” by Audrey Niffenegger. Read it. My favorite movie is “Love & Sex” with Famke Janssen and Jon Favreau (Josh Hopkins from Cougar Town also makes an appearance). I’m sure you’ve never heard of it (unless your name is Courtney K!) and that’s a shame because it’s hilarious. So, do yourself a favor and become acquainted.

11)   I don’t drink beer. Like, ever. I assure you, this is not some sort of moral stand I am taking against alcohol (because I loooooove me some vodka). I just really dislike the smell and taste of beer. When I was in my early 20s, I was always embarrassed of this. Stupid, right? I just didn’t want people to think I was the uptight girl who was too good for a can of Coors Light and NEEDED a mixed drink instead. But, guess what! I’m a grown-up now, and don’t care what anyone thinks of me and most CERTAINLY will not drink beer just to make things easier on a hostess. Find me some wine (white) or find me some liquor! If you were my real friend, you’d already have a drink for me made.

Because this entry is already incredibly long, I’m going to split my acceptance up into two posts! (I’m sure The Husband would say that is so like me, to drag out something which I’ve deemed incredibly important yet nobody else cares about, as long as possible. He’d be right in saying that.) So, stay tuned and thanks again to my love, Alexandra!

girl scout cookie, favorite girl scout cookie, most popular girl scout cookie

I found this chart on a very reliable source — Google images. What’s your favorite Girl Scout cookie?

The problem with Girl Scout cookies is that there are no problems with Girl Scout cookies. And that is exactly why every spring, my husband and I end up with approximately one bajilliony boxes. My boss’s daughter comes in, with her little sash, asking if I’d like to buy some? Suuuuuure. Sign me up for some Thin Mints. A neighbor girl proudly goes door to door, introducing herself and asking if you’d like to support her troop? Two Tagalongs, please. I buy all of our groceries on sale or with coupons. I’d never drop $4 on oh-so-delicious Keebler E.L Fudges. But when it comes to Girl Scout cookies, I have no problem forking over twenties of dollars.

When I was a young lass, I was a Girl Scout. And, under no circumstance, would my mom or dad bring my sheet to work. You want to sell some cookies, they’d say, then YOU sell some cookies. There was no pass-the-sheet-around-the-office. I was patrolling the neighborhood and hounding relatives. “You only want one box of Samoas? Nobody WANTS a box of Samoas. You’re going to regret not getting the Thin Mints, too, so I’m just going to put you down for both. Ok? Great!”

90s art kitI loved selling cookies and could sell them to anyone. Oh, you’re on a diet? Diabetic? Buy them for someone else. Oh, you have sons who are selling wrapping paper at this time? Then you better buy three boxes. They’ll need their energy. Not that you really need to push Girl Scout cookies on anyone, but if there was any hesitation, I did a great job swaying them. (I grew up and never worked a day in sales. I guess I wanted to go out on top.)

The prizes for cookie sales really made it worth it … my small, undeveloped child’s brain thought. But let’s time out to do some math for a hot second. One of my favorite prizes was an art kit. If you grew up in the 90s, you know exactly what kit I’m talking about. 30 markers. 20 crayons (horrible, barely-even-make-a-mark crayons), 20 oil pastels, 20 colored pencils and a rainbow of watercolor paints. I usually averaged 150 boxes of cookies (rockstar, I tell you.) Now, 150 boxes at $2.50 a box (Were they really that cheap? I probably invented that number) = $375. (Guys, you can put away your abacus and rest assured that my math was right, ‘cause I used a calculator.) I raised $375 for my troop and was rewarded with a $10 art kit? Now, that’s some bullshit. I hope the prizes are better (and more proportionately distributed) today.

My first box of the season. And it came in a pretty bag. How can you say no to that?!

My first box of the season. And it came in a pretty bag. How can you say no to that?!

One of my favorite nine-year-olds recently interrogated me about Girl Scout cookies. She had some valid questions. Why don’t the Girl Scouts make their own cookies? Are the cookies made in some factory by some OTHER over-worked, under-privileged kids? Did the Girl Scouts get to keep all the money? They can’t keep ALL the money, because you need money to buy ingredients and boxes. But how much money to do the Girl Scouts get to keep? What do they do with that money? Why are Thin Mints so delicious?!

And, really, her last question is the whole problem with Girl Scout cookies. Sure, they’re over-priced and the market is saturated with them several times a year and the girls don’t get to keep all the money and the prizes are not very high in value and most moms and dads bring the sheet into work and sell the cookies for them anyways resulting in little life experience gained by the child. But if you put all that aside for a minute, they sure are delicious. And is something being too delicious really that much of a problem?